Friday, 21 September 2012

Living Systems

Environment day today was about creating: Living Systems. Thank you Jesus for teaching us about love. Thank you to everyone who gave their time today to create a 'worm hole' and an experimental 'worm mound'. We are grateful for your efforts! We are excited!

A worm found already in residence.
They were few and far between
So grateful for the tractor - what a great hole digger!!!

It was a really great day learning about the earth, ourselves and how to create abundance through giving love and supporting the intelligent life systems without expectation* that support us. 

I feel that one of the greatest gifts was the fact that if want to take and we want for everything to be given to us from the earth; If we do not desire to give and love the earth, land and all the intelligent life - the fungi, bacteria, microbes, micro-organisms, worms, insects, and all the creating things - then it is really best to not begin in the first place. The whole exercise is an exercise in giving for the pure desire to give to that which creates. To give without gain. 

The hole
What I learnt today is that I need to be like a worm hole. 

To stop expecting and demanding** from the earth and the land and to trust God's abundance and her way of creating and see the way she creates and help out the best that I can by providing food, water, shelter to everything that sustains life. To all the insects, fungi, bacteria, microbes, micro-organisms etc these are our friends and our desire to erridicate them reflects how much negative, self serving desire we have and how little we understand about the way that the world operates as God designed it. We create more and more problems that then need fixing. We are exhausting ourselves with meaningless things that could be done so much more easily if we were more humble, more logical and actually understood what God has gifted us in the first place. We humans claim to be intelligent but I am beginning to wonder, smile. What I saw today is that God's way is best*** and it is beautiful, magical, abundant and can create wonderlands.... We are excited about the experiment and to see 'who moves in' and what happens.

Thank you to all ye who volunteered your time!
Thank you Jesus for showing us 'how', for
explaining the principles, the logic and love behind the
whole system!

Thank you Lena for your time and expertise
in filming and documenting the entire process.

making clay creations

preparing the hole for minerals

adding minerals to 'help' the soil

Our dear friends and leaders in Love and logic - Thank you!!

jostling the bale into place

cardboard packing

the more cardboard the better -  food

more  food

and more food

and more food

and more food 

add manure, add worms

cover with mulch to keep moist
what a lovely 'bug' palace

cover with woodchips

add some homes for other fauna

taking a wee rest

The beginning of the worm 'mound'
Bale of hay wedged into a bit of open soil
and separated to create decomposition not composting.
'Bugs' don't like too much heat
the beginnings of worm food slurry/brew

make a worm food slurry/brew water, poo,
decomposed hay, small bits of cardboard 

fill the gaps with cardboard and manure

put the slurry/brew under the newspaper in all the
holes and cracks so that there is moisture

thank you for all your efforts!

Put it all together

cover in manure, mulch it with hay, cover with wood chips and
then put fallen branches  (ones that have not been on the
ground long and that have not begun creating habitat.) To
hold the mound in place and create habitat and encourage other
fauna and flora to come and make their homes!

The mound

encouraging what is already there - feeding a white ants nest,
adding cardboard and wood chips to encourage the
life and support it where it is.

pretty exciting

Can't wait to see what happens!

* Today I learnt how much expectation I have about things giving to me in order for me to get what i want. I learnt how much demand we have and how much pressure we put on the earth rather than giving to the earth abundantly and without expectation to encourage intelligent living flora and fauna to create it's own living self creating systems. 

** This is an emotional change not just an intellectual exercise that we can think into existance. It takes us emotionally releasing the demands and expectations that we have on things to sustain us. To grow our desire to love, grow our desire to give and our desire to find out about all the intelligent life that God has created and support it purely because we desire to support it and for no other reason. 

*** In my arrogance I am not always humble to this fact and try to force my way, but when it is logically explained I wonder why I thought there was any other but God's way. Much to learn and how exciting!

Sunday, 16 September 2012

To Do, Or Not To Do, That is the Question...

I have been trying for a long time now. Trying* does not work. Pete reminds me it's really simple,  'you do it or you don't do it'. Either is actually okay**. Making that simple decision 'to do, or, not to do' saves much time, effort and energy.

Investigating why I do or don't want to often leads me to discover things about myself, but this is also a choice. I don't have to engage this unless I want to. Though, I am finding I am actually enjoying finding out some*** of the details of myself.

It is like reading a book that you sort of vaguely remember and re-reading it years later and 'remembering' all the details and how things linked up. It is at moments, exciting, others it brings up rage, disappointment, disillusionment, my illusions are challenged/shattered and what I feel are the 'realer' feelings are exposed.

Along with not 'trying' so hard all the time I have been seriously self talking myself out of self-punishment and it is amazing how much lighter life is when I do. I feel I can see much more clearly what is going on. What the Law of Attraction is revealing to me and a sort of 'overview' of where I am in my life each day.

It is quite facinating. I am not always emotionally embracing of what I am shown. I am not always excited about what is shown to me, but there is no doubt in my mind that a picture is forming and it feels like a jigsaw of 'forgotten' or maybe 'refound' pieces. I am also relieved and have a feeling of 'finally the truth!' It might not be God's Truth (yet, smile), there is error there, but for the first time I am discovering my own personal truth. The truth of what I feel, what I felt and how it was for me, I am discovering my story. I still struggle and buy into my addictions especially for approval from others, but with self reflection, and I feel loving guidance, I am able to see myself doing that, mostly in hindsight, but at times I can also make a different decision**** the next time it comes up.

* 'Trying is Lying' quote from Mary Magdalena
**I have been told this, though, I do not feel this and I struggle with making the decision and feeling okay about the one I make
*** There are still things I am not open/excited/enjoying finding out about myself.
**** I think it would be much easier long term to feel through the addiction and not have it anymore, but at this time I am still very attached to my addictions and want them badly so often I am intellectually making a different decision which is not a permanent change, it is a very 'try hard' action and does get exhausting for the small unsatisfactory amount I 'get' from it.

'Soapbox' Drama

I feel frustrated at times about the reoccurring issues that arise in my life and I have been told often and finally am coming to the conclusion that really nothing is going to change until I release the cause of these things*. I feel like I am perpetually focused on the effects and dealing with those, which I call the ‘soapbox drama’ in order to avoid the ‘real (causal) drama’.

I prefer to remain caught up and exhausted by the effects I create and not dealing with the cause. 

The more that I discover the story of my life, images, memories, feelings, events, and (sometimes) feel them, more often at the moment just own them, I realise that the less ‘soapbox’ I need. There is ‘drama’ enough in my life without needing to create more. 

Dear God,

May I have the courage to delve into the ‘real drama’ to feel what entered me as a child and to release it ‘as a child’ would, rather than holding onto the cause and allowing it to continually create painful effects that cause more pain and damage to others.

Love Eloisa

*It is not due to not trying to change things and make them different. I have tried and it isn't working - much to my chagrin. It is through the constant experience of having the same issues keep coming up, the same Law of Attraction revealing itself, in many different ways - incase I didn't understand the last one that showed up - that I am coming to the conclusion that there has to still be the same emotion/s in me to cause the same outcome. And doing the same thing over and over again is beginning to be quite tiring as there is no change. So something I figure needs to be done differently. It also makes sense that due to the same thing happening that I have not dealt with what is creating it, the cause, otherwise I am suspecting it could/would be very different. Hmmm something to act about here.