Wednesday, 18 January 2012

I Am NOT Alone!

I had an intellectual realisation this morning as I put the washing in the machine*. It is not written on my heart yet as my life hasn't changed**, but it did give me some hope.

Mostly in my life I feel alone and like I have to do everything by myself (VERY self reliant). I realised*** the Truth is that I am never alone, God is ALWAYS there, ALWAYS loving me and ready at any moment to be with me if I allow Her to be. So in my arrogance, self reliance and self absorption I fight my way along 'trying' when actually God is totally there wanting to help me and I am ignoring Him. (I do have to feel for myself, God can't do that for me, I am the only one who can release the error out of my soul, BUT I am not alone in doing it, I have a friend always by my side****). I feel I may have to 'realise' this more than once if it does not enter my heart. This morning I felt excited by it!

As always I have a choice here, to feel or to deny my feelings. I will see how courageous I am over the next while and how willing I am to emotionally experience my life rather than intellectually working it out, trying to control and avoid it.

Thank you God!

* I am SO GRATEFUL for the washing machine and appliances that give me time to do other things.

** I have to be more honest with myself. My Life has not changed drastically, and The Law of Attraction is still showing me that I have not released my causal emotions and until that changes I know that I still have those emotions within me, no matter how much I tell myself I am different and 'better' I am not and thank you God that you show me that - even when I don't want to see/feel/hear it! Thank you for making it instant and obvious!

*** Realisations are so fascinating I reckon. It is like I say or think I 'get it' often when things are talked about, or I hear about them, but until I actually FEEL it and experience for myself or even sort of intellectually realise it for MYSELF I actually don't 'get it' at all, I merely THINK I do. Something to look into here I feel, how much am I telling myself I understand when in fact I don't understand at all?

**** This made me realise that I haven't experienced or given the gift of true friendship very often in my life.