Saturday, 15 December 2012

Thoughts on Children

I have been thinking about children a lot lately and the role of being a ‘parent’. From what I understand God is our real parent and I am but a ‘surrogate’, my role really being only to disclose what I have learnt about Love and Truth and God, or maybe it is even less than that. Maybe if I just convey to the little souls ‘How to...,’ ‘How to connect to God...’ then they will discover the rest. This is obviously quite difficult if I have not learnt to do this myself and if it is not in my heart and I am merely holding it in my head. Also there is a problem if I do not feel this myself (which to be honest personally I do not - yet). 

Often I feel that I am the ‘god’ in our house and that children should do what I say, when I say, how I say, immediately and without questioning me. This is pretty unreasonable behaviour when I reflect upon it and something I feel I would rebel about or seriously question if it was happening to me, so why do I expect it from the little ones in my care? Why are they any different to me? Why do boss them round, yell at them and often treat children ‘less than’? A good question. 

I feel there are a lot of illogical, untrue beliefs around children, both now and historically children have been abused, violently treated, and very badly harmed*. To be honest I feel children often still are being treated in this way. Some of the behaviours I have observed in myself and other parents would not be accepted if they were done to adults or if a ‘stranger‘ did them, but due to the fact that the ‘parent‘ did it is deemed okay. 

I feel that there is a problem with this. 

I also feel that the only way it is going to be any different is if we begin to take personal responsibility for our actions, be VERY truthful with ourselves about how we actually feel, what we believe and what we think we are allowed to do with a ‘parent’ title. I also feel that it is going to be absolutely essential to choose Love, and by love I mean love God’s way. 

I feel we need to choose to love and to give (God's way) and to allow the pain that is within us to be expressed without projecting it on others, including our children. We also need to stop making others liable for our own unhealed emotions and to actually own them ourselves, trace them to their source /cause and take personal responsibility for what we have chosen to do in response to what was done to us and what happened to us. We need to choose Love and Peace over violence (choose love over fear and anger, and choose to stand up to violent persons lovingly). Though I do not practice this wholeheartedly -yet- I believe it is possible and I believe that it has the possibility to change the entire world.

We are the only ones that can allow our own personal pain out and we are the only ones that can be sorry and repent the harm and pain that we have put into and caused others. 

Really unless we are willing to forgive those that have hurt us and to truly be sorry towards those we have hurt, the cycles are going to continue. I do not claim to be an expert at this or even to have engaged this process fully yet. 

I am experiencing first hand how the cycle continues though, and no matter how hard I ‘try’ to be different or just act differently to what I experienced and what happened to me as a child, I notice I am re-creating it due to the fact that ‘trying’ doesn’t make a difference. The feelings, beliefs, emotions that are in me dictate the outcome positive and negative. The cause creates the effect and if I do not release the cause the effects are going to be the same. And I am noticing this is true in my life at this time!

I feel when I was growing up there was a certain exceptions and a ‘code of behaviour’ that I was expected to conform to. This was set up by my surrogate parents who felt they ‘knew best’. If I did not follow the ‘rules’ there were various ‘negative’ feeling consequences, often punishments. I am also guilty of setting up a similar paradigm with the children in our care of which I am not proud and am endeavoring to change. Though I can see a pattern which seems intergenerational to me, I do not feel it is ‘right’. In fact I can see how flawed and unkind it is, I personally feel how damaging it was. I feel it can be different and it can be changed in a positive direction and in a couple of generations if we truly desired it. I feel there is a different way to be, a different way to ‘parent’.  Just because ‘that has been the way it has always been’, does not mean that is has to be the the way it is or will be! I believe that it can change if we have the courage to look at ourselves as ‘parents’ and what is really going on within ourselves and between us, our partners and the children in our care.

From what I have observed children FEEL, rather than grasp intellectual concepts and thoughts (especially when small). The idea of ‘do what I say, not what I do’ does not work. Children are feeling beings not thinking beings**(when they are very small). As they grow older and are conditioned by their environment often they learn to be otherwise and for myself I became very intellectual to avoid the painful feelings that were inside of me. Unfortunately this has also stunted the joyous feelings too. 

What I realise also though is that children are a gift. If I am willing to be humble, open and learn I can discover a huge amount about myself and the unloving emotions that are within me. They expose those rapidly and with precision - if you want to know.

I look forward to getting to a place of just loving the little souls in our care for the sole reason that they are a gift and totally beautiful beings! Not because I want things from them, emotionally, physically, addictivly etc.  

There is so much to love about children and learn from them. I love their excitement, watching them discover and learn stuff, they are naturals at that! I am realising how much I  can learn from them if I can put my 'I'm an adult and supposed to know more than you' belief aside. Really it is being humble to being taught by them rather than the other way round. I would like to be as open, forgiving, accepting, loving, humble as they are again! I feel I've really grown down not up, smile.

I often feel I have more to learn from the Children in our care than I have to ‘teach’ them. If I was truly humble and owned my unhealed emotions rather than projecting them all upon the children, I feel it would be a much more enjoyable process for both them and myself.

The kids love going on adventures, they are pretty keen explorers and discoverers and are constantly finding 'new' species (new to them and often to me, smile). Quite amazing when you think about the process of our being, everything happens a first time, like discovering actually never ends, there is always something we do not know, we have not seen, we do not understand.... To actually embrace that wholeheartedly, that would be a place I would like to be! To be childlike with the children in our care! What a gift, what an honor, what an adventure if I choose to truly embrace that!!!

* Robin Grille’s book Parenting for a Peaceful World gives some enlightening information about ‘the history of’ childhood.

** I am beginning to feel we all actually are feeling beings if were more in touch with how God intended us to be. I have heard that God made us to be totally feeling beings and experience everything through feeling. I feel for myself I have learnt to deny my feelings, to justify, intellectualize, minimise and numb out from what I really feel in order to ‘fit in’ and be ‘accepted’. Often people encourage others to feel ‘but only so much’ and ‘only for so long’ and ‘only certain emotions that don’t make me feel uncomfortable.’ In my experience there are a lot of ‘rules’ and beliefs around feelings sometimes those differ depending on the environment that you grew up in. 

Friday, 7 December 2012

'Summerfest' Thank You!

Thank you to everyone who volunteered their time at
'Summerfest 2012 Project'! 
We are so grateful for your time and efforts.
Thank you to Jesus and Mary and the God's Way of Love Organisation for all their input, advice, direction and hands on and behind the scenes input. Thank you to the Team Leaders, their assistants, Tony our bus driver, all those who volunteered expertise, time and resources in all areas including pre makeing things e.g. bird boxes, transporting equipment, contributing 'food' - newspapers, etc for the living systems - and all the bits in between.  

We really enjoyed ourselves, learnt HEAPS and had lots of fun. Hope you did too. Enjoy implementing all the exciting experiments into your own land and gardens! 
Enjoy experimenting until we see you next, smile. 

With Thanks, from the Lytton-Hitchins Family.

Thank you to these two beautiful friends of ours for their love,
time, patience, guidance, advice and so much much more!!

Thank you to all of you who supported various parts of the
project. Thank you to the team leaders and their assistants
and all those who volunteered their time for this event.

Project manager and expert consultant.
Thank you both for your vision and enthusiasm.

Thank you to Tony our bus driver for
your time and expertise! 

setting up camp. Hope you enjoyed the thunder storms,
Glad most of you stayed intact, smile.

Thank you to everyone pitched in and helped out in all sorts of ways! To those of you who worked the land, those who facilitated, organised and ran the event, those who volunteered time, energy and resources. We are so grateful for all of it!

'Food' for systems.
Thank you so much to everyone who contributed newspaper
and cardboard, including Bunnings, the Independent, Kentucky Store,
 and others.  Thank you to Shane, Philippa, Lincon, Paul,
and all others who have trekked back and forth to the
paper shed over the last months. If you still feel like
collecting paper and cardboard and dropping it by, or we are happy
to collect it, please do we have many more systems to
 fill and we would love to keep it coming!
Living system before 


 Nesting Boxes:
bird boxes flat packed

 'Reptile Heaven':
finished at the top

during - under construction

reptile habitat

reptile habitat

Waterless Garden:




in progress
Once again Thank you!!! We are excited about what will develop next in 'God's Garden'...

Friday, 23 November 2012

Preparations Day One & Two

The last couple of days have begun and been busy organising things for 'Summerfest'. We are grateful to all who have volunteered time and resources over the last while and especially the last couple of days organising, sourcing, gathering, delivering... Thank you so much to our neighbours for giving us their wood piles to put in the systems and to everyone who has contributed newspaper, cardboard, wooden pallets, cardboard bales, time etc.

Chopping Cardboard for 'Worm food slurry':

making a cardboard roll
feeding it in

worm food

 Neighbour's forest and wood piles. Gathering, chopping, transporting wood. New discoveries and wonders:

tall trees
termite mound
dead matter pile



ant highway and animal
shaped wood

somethings home
gaul wasp nodes

Standbye Paddock Preparation:

new contour

pond beginning to fill from a beautiful downpour of
rain. We suggest you bring your gumboots!

Things just want to grow!! Growth on the contours beginning

fertility system/living system hole partially full of water

 Another load of wood from the neighbours - thank you!!
We kept imagining this being planted out and created into
a beautiful forest again! It has so much potential. 
load on the move
investigating all sorts of new things.
what is happening around some of the woodpiles at the
neighbours. They are naturally creating living
systems. It was really exciting to see what is happening.
There were some different soil creatures,
beetles, ants, insects etc beginning. Not much else, but there is life.
I feel there was much that I 'couldn't' see also doing lots of work.

sculptural log stacking

what water does to wood


new home

 Thanks so much for all your help, 'pre' preparing! We are grateful for your desire, help and growing friendships!

after some rain